By the time we were all grown, her hands had become worn and wrinkled from years of labour. Yet, she never expressed regret. She would say she had lived a meaningful life. She did not regret marrying my father, leaving her hometown, or coming to Singapore alone without family or friends.
Love is a lifelong commitment.
My mother was born in a small fishing village in Malaysia. She grew up with traditional values and a deep belief in marriage—that once you commit, you honour your role and responsibilities for life.
She often shares stories of how my father courted her and the journey that led to their marriage. She also speaks about the challenges she faced when she left her hometown and moved to Singapore to start a new life with him.
In the 1960s, it was commonly believed that when a Malaysian woman married into a traditional family in Singapore, she was considered to have “married out.” This meant she was expected to reduce contact with her own family. My mother recalled the deep sadness she felt when she was not allowed to return to Malaysia, even to attend her parents’ funerals. Her duties in Singapore came first—she had responsibilities as the eldest daughter-in-law, as a wife, and as a mother to five children.
Life was not easy. My father had limited education and moved from job to job, earning just enough to get by. To support the family, my mother took on laundry work for construction workers living in the kampong. Every day was filled with hard work and worry about putting food on the table. There was hardly a day of rest.
By the time we were all grown, her hands had become worn and wrinkled from years of labour. Yet, she never expressed regret. She would say she had lived a meaningful life. She did not regret marrying my father, leaving her hometown, or coming to Singapore alone without family or friends.
As her daughter, I have learnt resilience from my mother. She faced many challenges, but she remained strong and continued to care for our family. Her life has taught me not to give up easily, even when things are difficult. I hope to carry her strength and love with me as I continue with my journey.
爱是一生的承诺。
我的母亲出生在马来西亚的一个小渔村。她从小接受传统价值观的熏陶，对婚姻有着深刻的信念——一旦做出承诺，就要终生履行自己的角色和责任。
她经常讲述父亲如何追求她，以及他们最终步入婚姻殿堂的历程。她也谈到离开家乡，前往新加坡与父亲开始新生活时所面临的挑战。
在20世纪60年代，人们普遍认为，马来西亚女性嫁入新加坡的传统家庭就意味着“嫁入异乡”。这意味着她需要减少与自己家人的联系。母亲回忆起，她因生活困境和责任，甚至连参加父母的葬礼都做不到，这让她感到无比悲伤。在新加坡，她的职责至上——她既是长媳，又是妻子，还是五个孩子的母亲。
生活并不轻松。父亲受教育程度不高，经常换工作，收入勉强糊口。为了养家糊口，母亲在甘榜为建筑工人做洗衣工。她每天都辛勤劳作，为生计担忧，几乎没有休息日。
等我们都长大成人时，她那双因多年劳作而布满皱纹的双手早已伤痕累累。然而，她从未后悔过。她常说，她的一生很有意义。她不后悔嫁给我的父亲，不后悔离开家乡，也不后悔独自一人来到新加坡，身边没有亲朋好友。
作为她的女儿，我从母亲身上学会了坚韧。她曾面临诸多挑战，但她始终坚强，一心守护着我们。她的人生教会了我，即使身处逆境，也绝不能轻易放弃。我希望，在我的人生旅途中，能够将她的力量和爱传承下去。
Love u mum!